K: I know what I want for Father’s Day. I want sugar cookies that spell “DAD.”
Me: You want sugar cookies for Father’s Day? Really?
K: Yes. I want seven sugar cookies that spell “DAD.”
Me: Wait—you want me to spell “DAD” using seven cookies?
K: No. I want seven DADs.
Me: So, like, fourteen DS and seven As?
K: And the cookies should have poppy seeds.
Me: Poppy seeds? Why?
K: It’s what I want.
Me: What is this for? Work?
K: It’s what I want for Father’s Day.
Me, spying a magazine on the back of the toilet: Kevin? Have you been reading my Martha Stewart magazine?
K: So I want those cookies. Oh, and also a BJ.*
Me being a dutiful wife and all, I gave him exactly what he asked for.
Note to Kevin: NEVER ask for a BJ on Father’s Day again, as the gifts are supposed to come from your children. Totally inappropriate.
*Hi Mom. Just wanted to clarify that BJ stands for Blueberry Jell-o.