1. Vincenzo was eating his dinner with his hands the other night so I said, “We’re going to have to send you to finishing school.” He looked over at Rocco, who was making an even bigger mess, and said, “If you send me to finishing school, you’re going to have to send him to starting school!”
2. Vincenzo saw Leo in the bouncy chair like this…
…and said, “Look, Mom! Leo is frozen in the sprinkler position!”
3, 4, and 5: These next ones are related to Vincenzo’s recently bourgeoning ability to read:
Driving by a Pizza Hut: Did you ever notice how that doesn’t look anything like a hut?
Reading our server’s nametag at his favorite restaurant: That person’s name is Red Robin Alexa!
Passing a sign that said “sanctuary” at church: Are we going to the sanatorium?