Maternity Monday: at least it’ snot the flu

Mondays are coming fast around here, eh?

So I got the cutest little cold last Monday.  I named it Baby Cold and showed it off to everyone around me.  On Friday, WHOMP.  Baby Cold grew up.  I didn’t see it coming. 

Since then, at random moments of the day and night various parts of my face start weeping a clear liquid.  When I sneeze it’s so forceful that this little fire lights in my lungs and also I have to change my underwear.  There was a day last weekend when, if someone had peeled all the skin off my face, I would have been just fine because of the thick covering of mucous right behind my skin.  I am disgusting. 

And of course, pregnant ladies can’t do a thing about colds except roll over and take it.  Only I can’t roll over because my stomach is so gigantic it is now messing with the tides; plus, rolling over involves lying down and I can’t lie down anymore because the heartburn that has been a constant since my second month of pregnancy decided to kick it up a notch this weekend. 

Oh, and  a new colony of spider veins popped out just below my knee sometime last week.

And I have gained more weight than I did with any of my other pregnancies and I still have 2 months to grow.

And I am still nauseous all. the. time.

Now go ahead and tell me in the comments how much you loved being pregnant and how you just glowed for nine months.

I dare you.