One CRAZY week

It’s been a crazy week for the mister at our house; we’ve only barely crossed paths a couple times since Monday.  Here are a few e-mails I’ve sent him this week.

Wednesday:

Hi.  This is your wife.  I have blue eyes, medium length brown hair with blond highlights.  I enjoy long walks on the beach and romantic comediesWhat do you look like?

When you get home tonight, please don’t remove the plate from the Tupperware full of leaves and twigs.  Vincenzo’s pet snail for a day is in there.  Its name is Speedy.  Also, we had a food emergency and needed to eat the sandwich we made for your lunch tomorrow.  Plan on buying.

Thursday:

Hello.  This is your wife.  I have straight, sandy colored hair and a nice smile.  I enjoy long, uninterrupted hours of silence and going to the bathroom all by myself, with no one else watching or helping.  What do you enjoy?

When you get home, please don’t remove the plate from the Tupperware full of leaves and twigs.  Vincenzo’s pet slug for a day is in there.  Its name is Flash.  Also, it appears Vincenzo has fallen asleep in our bed, where you normally sleep.  You might want to head straight for the couch when you get home.

Friday:

Hello.  This is your wife.  I’m 5’3 with a sporty build; people describe me as “petite.”  I enjoy expensive, exotic vacations and receiving gifts of very large diamonds.  It doesn’t really matter what you look like or enjoy, as long as you can remember what I look like and what I enjoy.

When you get home, please don’t remove the plate from the Tupperware full of leaves and twigs.  Vincenzo’s pet potato bug for a day is in there.  Its name is Rocket.  Also, please leave the tortilla and Ziploc baggie of peanut butter hanging from the chandelier; they’re part of Vincenzo’s astronaut snack.

WHAT’S COOKIN’ 2NITE:
Peanut butter tortillas

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4 thoughts on “One CRAZY week

  1. {heart} I might have to swipe your flirty email “personal ads.”

    hee heee i think the astronaut’s snack is hilarious.

  2. Too funny- James and Vincenzo are on the same schedule. We have a jar of sticks and leaves on the counter that houses his new bug pet named HellBoy.

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