My bloggy friend Keiko is a mother of two boys, like myself (though technically I’ve had three boys), and she has started to get the same looks/comments from other people who lament that she doesn’t have a girl. “You’ll just have to keep trying!” they say, like maybe the reason we don’t have girls is because we simply didn’t try hard enough to have a girl the first two times. Some people look at us like we’re dressed to the nines in designer clothes but oh, how sad that we’re missing all of our limbs.
Would my life be any more fulfilled if one of my sons was a girl? Absolutely not. Would I be any happier? No. Would I be having more fun? No. Would I be richer? Would I be more famous? Would skinnier jeans look better on me? No, no, and no.
I’ve started noticing that girls around Vincenzo’s age have started vying for popularity around each other. They whisper now. They group off together. You see some sitting on the sidelines, wondering how they can get in the group. You see some hang in the group for awhile, then realize it doesn’t feel like they thought it would. You see that one of them has been deemed queen and seems to have some kind of power, at the tender age of four.
While all this is going on, the boys are running and jumping and tousling with each other; tackling, pouncing; shouting happily. They play in one gigantic group. Their main goal is to see if they can make each other laugh, and if there are any social divisions around them, nobody has told them. It is so refreshing, as a mother-of-boys, to be a part of the rough-and-tumble group this time around—to not have to relive the stress and pain of cliques for another 18 years.
Would I take a baby girl if one fell into my lap? In a heartbeat. Would I take a baby boy if one fell into my lap? In the same heartbeat.*
I am happy with my boys. And I’m glad Vincenzo has girl friends because girls and girlie things are so fun to take pictures of.
WHAT’S COOKIN’ 2NITE:
*As long as that heartbeat is a few years away (or maybe never). I still haven’t quite gotten the hang of having just two kids!