Does Santa read blog posts?

Things I don’t feel funny enough to blog about, so here is a C- attempt:

1.  Gingerbread cookies

IMG_6915

Brrrr.  I’m cold.

 

IMG_6788
Hey, can one of you guys google “black tears”?

IMG_6913

Has anyone seen my neck?

2.  Our Christmas lights.  I was going to take pictures and write this glorious post about how this year I got smart and decided to skip the whole climb-on-the-roof and use-a-ladder thing by simply hanging—taping, rather—the Christmas lights to our new deck in the back of the house.  Then I was going to be all braggy about how we our house was sporting the mullet of Christmas lights: business in the front, Christmas party in the back.

But then this happened.  Those little white things on the railing are pieces of tape.

IMG_6920

And those colorful things on our lawn would be our Christmas lights.

IMG_6921

I asked Kevin if he would help me put them back up and he suggested maybe I should use double-sided tape this time.  I suggested he maybe should go screw himself.

3.  I’ve had this metallic taste in my mouth for a few weeks now and when I *bing*d possible causes I decided it’s most likely a #5) iron deficiency, as I am usually anemic, so I started taking my iron-laden prenatal vitamins again but the metallic taste is still there, possibly because of likely cause #7) prenatal vitamins so now I’m wondering if maybe it’s something more like likely cause #2) cadmium poisoning because Kevin has taken a sudden interest in making me toddies each night and also because there’s absolutely no chance that it’s likely cause #8) hormonal because IF YOU DON’T GET THOSE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS HUNG UP BY DINNER TONIGHT I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL MAKE YOU CRY BLACK TEARS.  NOW GO MAKE ME MY EGGNOG RUM BUTTERSCOTCH WHATEVER THINGGY AGAIN.  AND DON’T SKIMP ON THE CADMIUM THIS TIME!

4.  I’m not sure whether I should confess to a priest, Ronnica, or Santa about that whole “swear to God” thing but it doesn’t matter.  I’m still not taking it out.

WHAT’S COOKIN’ 2NITE:
Things that taste like metal

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “Does Santa read blog posts?

  1. I love the possible reasons for the metallic taste, especially cause #8. Laughed out loud on that one 🙂 Merry Christmas!

  2. I just google*d that as well, and I found an avant garde solution for you. Take the METAL OUT of your mouth. Voila! Metal taste GONE.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s