Something has to be done!

Okay, I need to stress about Rocco’s name again even though I’ve said it all before and none of it really matters anyway.  Chalk it up to my OCD.  (After this I’ll go wash my hands a few times, too).

When we told people Vincenzo’s name, our biggest reaction was: “Vin-sen-zio?  Am I saying that right?”  We’d explain that no, they weren’t, and they probably never would be able to because they just didn’t have the mental capacity to do so.  His name itself is a sort of preliminary IQ screening test for any potential friends or neighbors.

But when I tell people Rocco’s name, I get a different reaction: “Oh…I know someone who just named their boy ‘Rocco,’ too!”  I hate that.  It’s not that we named him Rocco solely to be unique…it’s Kevin’s middle name, and he was named very significantly after someone dear to his father’s heart named Rocky (you know…the one from the movies?). 

(His sister was named after Wendy from Peter Pan.) 

(His Dad really, really likes TV.) 

But uniqueness was definitely a factor in deciding our second son’s name.  I mean, you can’t exactly introduce your sons “Vincenzo” and “Joe” and still feel good about yourself.  Anyway, I’m worried that by the time Rocco gets to kindergarten he’ll have to be called “Rocco B.” or worse still, “Rocco T.B.,” which makes it sound like he’s the Rocco with “an often deadly infectious disease caused by mycobacteria.”

So let’s review what I know:

1.  Madonna’s son is named Rocco (this I already knew; I’m just hoping it goes unnoticed in the shadow of Lourdes’ name)
2.  There is another baby named Rocco at Rocco’s own pediatrician’s office (Kevin keeps trying to convince me the “other baby” is actually our own Rocco)
3.  Just yesterday I found out that the son of the cousin of the lady in the Starbucks’ parking lot was also recently named Rocco

See?  EVERYONE is naming their sons Rocco!  People, I need your help.  If you know of anyone considering naming their child or their dog after my son,  I beg you  TALK THEM OUT OF IT.  Tell them of Rocco the Porn Star, but not Rocco the saint, for example.  Tell them their son will spend his whole life being rhymed with “taco.”   Tell them it’s spelled with a silent G at the beginning.  Just do something!

And for heaven’s sake, delete this blog post after reading it.  I’ve said too much already .

9 thoughts on “Something has to be done!

  1. You’re such a trend setter. So I’ve always heard Vincenzo’s name in my head as having a “ch” where the c is… I a total dork?

  2. Rocco huh? There is also another blogger with a son named Rocco. Just sayin’. Rocco is like the new John. He’s so screwed. And I alwasy think of Rocco’s Modern world…I watched it when I was a kid, it was a weird program. You have seriously messed your child up. Especially now that he’s going to have to be called TB. You know how kids feel about TB. Brutal. Just brutal.

    Im so kidding you know that right? Oh yeah and Vincenzo reminds me of Under the Tuscan Sun. Though I dont think there is anyone named Vicenzo in the movie, but that’s what it reminds me of. Is it sad that names take me to TV? Ok…stopping now…

  3. I thought your kid’s name was Mbungo. Are you saying you want to adopt Madonna’s kid, because that’s what I got.

  4. Well, at least he’ll be the only Rocco in his class that has a complex because his mom hates his name. So you got that going for you.

  5. I think he’ll be okay. Rocco might not be as unique as you had thought/hoped, but I doubt it’ll be the new Jacob or anything. Not that I don’t think it’s a cute name!

  6. Funny…you always make me laugh. When I was trying to think of a name for my fourth son I had a hard time, too. I don’t really care for the “all the same first letters” or the “rhyming name game” that people do with their children. But, when I got to my fourth I realized that all my kids had “K’s” in their names. I didn’t mean to do it, really!! I then had a Kyle, Jakob, Luke and oh, no what to name the fourth. I had the same problem of here are my kids Kyle, Jakob, Luke and Steven. It just didn’t sound right. So, now….I am like the rest all of my kids have “K’s” in their names and it drives me nuts!! Kyle, Jakob, Luke and Kameron!

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