The education of Little V

QUICKIE: Vincenzo: “Mom, if I eat and eat and eat a lot, then will I be four?”
Things we have told Vincenzo with straight faces:

1.  McDonalds grows its own special kind of apple trees that produce peel-less apples.  They hang from the tree in little cellophane bags, and when the bags reach 35 calories the whole town turns out for a day of festivities and apple picking.  And that’s how they end up in your Happy Meal.

2.  (At Claim Jumper, looking up at all the fans connected by a big belt)  Do you know what makes those fans turn?  It’s 100 bunny rabbits that Claim Jumper keeps up there and they run and run all day, which turns the fans.  At night they let the bunnies loose in the restaurant to clean up the scraps everyone leaves around.  What’s that?  Oh.  Sure.  Go ahead and leave your kale under the table for the bunnies.  I’ll leave mine too.

3.  “Schling” is a real letter in our alphabet.  In fact, your name is spelled V-I-N-SCHLING-E-N-Z-O

And now for some reason he doesn’t believe me when I say things like, “This chair is made of wood.”  “No!” he says knowingly, “You’re teasing!”

Then again, maybe he’s right.  The chair is from Ikea.

Leftovers again (The butcher told me I should buy a POUND of corned beef PER PERSON.  It’s been a looooong week.)

5 thoughts on “The education of Little V

  1. If you had totally made up everything you said in this post, for the sake of the funny and cute,, you’d kind of not be making it up, because you already established you make stuff up. Or something like that. Isn’t blogging the best?

  2. When I was little I asked my mom if people could run out of words if they talked too much. She assured me they could and I should save my words. I can’t wait to use that one on B.

  3. All I can do is laugh – a few days ago I was in the grocery store and I overheard a lady talking on her cell, saying she “lied” to her eight year old for the first time ever. She told her if she did not wear tights under her dress, they would not let her into church. If she could she could grow up in your family. Oh to be a Beto! Some day I will become a fly and land on a wall in your house. I wil proably fall off the wal because I will be laughing so hard.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s